What/Who I love the most today is my MOM!!!!!!

This could not have worked out more perfectly because I love my mom the most today and today is her birthday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Well November 4th that is.)

My mom grew up mainly in Southern California, she attended Chatsworth High School and she met my dad through her younger brother.  I think my mom was twenty one or twenty two when she had me, about the same age as I was when I had my first baby.

My mom and dad were not married and they stayed together after having me a short time as I don't remember us living together.  My mom was a single mom, working and trying to raise a daughter.  She was also a practicing Alcoholic.  This time was hard for me and for her.

But, my mom got sober when I was about ten and she has been sober ever since.  This is where I believe my mom's story begins, in my eyes anyway.   My mom being sober was a dream come true for me.  To most girls at this age, I'm sure a "dream come true" was  Christmas morning, vacations or even sleepovers.  I remember how I felt at this age and it was uneasy, scared and tired.  I just wanted my mom to be okay.

This post is about my mom, but her experiences were my experiences and so through my perspective you will hear some of my feelings.

My mom is a success story for sure.  Staying sober isn't easy and it sure isn't easy to stay sober the first time around.  But, she did because she knew she had to, or I wouldn't be in her life as much.

 Guess what?  After she got sober, she met her husband Jerry, who became my step-dad.  I loved Jerry.  He was a great man.  He loved my mom, that was very evident.  He provided for us and he was always very respectful of my mom and I and our relationship.   When I was thirteen, they had my brother James Douglas.  I loved him so much.  I always wanted a brother or sister.  I remember bathing him and feeding him, the normal stuff you do for babies.

My mom and Jerry were married for almost eighteen years when he passed away from Prostate Cancer.  My brother, James was fifteen.  This was devastating, obviously.   He loved my mom so much and she loved him.  When something like this happens it's hard to know what to do, my mom was a wreck as she should have been, not just for herself but for a boy who had lost his father.  And her life just became a different life over night, literally.   More trials were ahead for my mom, not to mention my brother.

Remember I said my mom is a success story?  Well, she proves to be successful one more time.  My mom has always struggled with her weight.  When I was little I heard her calling herself  "fat" and I remember her dieting.  I didn't think she was fat.

My mom has told me a little of what her life was like growing up and it's frustrating.  Frustrating because her parents always had her on a diet and she remembers her parents ordering "special" pants from the Sears catalogue called "Chubbies."  I feel for my mom because things could have been handled so differently.  But they weren't so a coping mechanism for her is to eat.  And this is what she did when her husband died.

This is my mom on the left, she is starting to look her heaviest.

Here, below in these two pictures my mom was I believe, at her heaviest.

Here is my mom lately.....HEALTHIER, BEAUTIFULLY SMILING, HAPPIER, GLOWING, RADIANT AND LOVELY!!!!!!!  And you'll never guess, she is about thirty pounds thinner than this picture.  This picture was taken earlier this summer.

My mom hasn't done any surgeries or weird diets.  She has changed her life.  She eats well, she stays away from things that are tempting for her, but doesn't deny herself something here or there either.  I've seen it for myself.  She's starting to exercise, it's just so great to watch.  She looks like she did when I was younger.  It's taken her three years to lose 120 pounds and she is AMAZING.

My mom and I have not always been so close.  No really, I mean there were some dark times.  I knew I had to move away to go to college so that we could separate ourselves and get a fresh start with one another and make changes.  She doesn't always agree with this (that I needed to move away) but she knows I'm right; right mom?  :)

Today, we are friends.  We laugh together, we have meaningful conversations and we enjoy each other.  I'm thankful that she was able to get her life together and then together again after trials, some of which were her own doing and some of which were not.  

Her identity isn't just wrapped up in her trials either.

She is an amazing and talented gal.  She is one of the best cooks I know.  She is one of the most charitable people I know.  She has a sarcastic sense of humor which I have always appreciated.  She has great fashion sense, always very put together, I love this about her.  She loves baseball, particularly the Dodgers and she has taught my children to sing "Take me out the Ball Game" with the insertion of none other than the Dodgers.  No, but seriously she knows so much baseball trivia not only about the Dodgers but about the other teams too.  I've often wondered, "how does she know all this stuff."  I continually check to see if she has applied to get onto a sports game show, because she would win..  There has got to be one on ESPN-mom have you checked into this?

The most important thing I've learned from my mom is that you can overcome and you can move on,  and you can be happy again and again.

I love you mom,  Happy Birthday.  You are an inspiration, that's for sure.

So today it's my mom who I love the most...